Tale of the Tape

DING DING DING DING... iiiiin this cornah... in black and white... weighing in at 235 pounds... former TNA wrestlah... A.J. Pierrrrrzynnnnnskiiiii.... Aaaaand in this cornah... in gray, blue and red... weighing in at 210 pounds... the Rantah from Atlantah... Michaelllll Barrrrrett....

It got chaotic in a hurry, but here's a recap of what happened in the square circle around home plate in the second inning Saturday at U.S. Cellular Field. There's always one side's story, the other side's story and the truth, but here's what the video reveals.

Brian Anderson hit a sacrifice fly to left field off of Rich Hill, who had loaded the bases with one out, and A.J. Pierzynski charged in to score from third. With on-deck hitter Scott Podsednik signaling for Pierzynski to slide as Matt Murton's throw came in on line but late, he instead threw a block on Barrett and knocked him six feet away onto his kiester, with Pierzynski's helmet and Barrett's mask flying off in the process. Technically a clean play so far; the collision was unnecessary, but not unexpected between two hardscrabble catchers in a high-profile series.

The throw bounced off Pierzynski, who had already scored but slapped the plate emphatically, and the ball squirted off toward the third-base dugout as both players stumbled to their feet simultaneously and into each other's paths. Pierzynski turned a shoulder into Barrett, who hooked his left arm around Pierzynski as Hill, backing up the play, pounced on the still-live ball. When Pierzynski turned around, Barrett connected on a sharp right hook to the back of his jaw, and by the time he finished throwing the punch, Podsednik had a hand on Barrett's chest protector.

Pierzynski reeled back and Podsednik tackled Barrett as home plate umpire Greg Gibson tried to intercede. Both managers charged toward the home plate area, and Anderson returned to the scene of his sac fly. Cub first-baseman John Mabry tried to intercept him, holding up his palms as Anderson threw a roundhouse that Stevie Wonder could have dodged, and within ten seconds of the collision both benches had their choice of two pile-ons or their own extracurricular activity.

Overall damage, two ejections for each team (Barrett and Mabry for the Cubs, Pierzynski and Anderson for the White Sox). Booting Mabry was a bad call, but suspension is likely for at least Barrett (just what the Cubs need, more at-bats for Henry Blanco, now at .053) and possibly Anderson and Pierzynski as well.

After a 13-minute delay, coming back with runners at second and third, Jerry Hairston playing first base for the first time in his career and Blanco behind the plate, Rich Hill's second pitch to Podsednik was a non-purpose-pitch breaking ball above his head, and you can pretty much guess where things went from there. A walk to load the bases, a belt-high pitch over the plate that became Tadahito Iguchi's first career grand slam, and...

Well, by now it's redundant to report on another blowout loss for the Cubs, but at least now there's a visible indicator that somebody's upset about the skid that has now grown to 3-13.

Dusty Baker spoke with Bob Brenly and Len Kasper between innings, and said his main concern with where the Cubs are headed is getting the starting rotation back. While Hill, Glendon Rusch, Jerome Williams and Angel Guzman are a combined 1-13, there are some bigger issues Baker should be thinking about. You could have the best starting pitching in the world, but you're going to keep losing if you don't score any runs.

The Cubs rank 30th out of 30 in the majors in RBIs, doubles, and by a wide margin, slugging percentage. 29th in runs scored, batting average, home runs, total bases and on-base percentage. 28th in hits. 26th in walks drawn. Dead last in the National League in every single one of those categories, and near the top in double play grounders. You can talk about how much payroll is on the DL until you're blue in the face, but when you're being outperformed in category after category by a Florida Marlins team with a $15 million payroll, you can't keep on beating that drum expecting it to be a viable explanation. And you can't keep attributing loss after loss to starting pitcher injuries when Cub pitchers still have allowed fewer hits than any team in the the NL and rank second in K's. The primary difference in pitching between now and a month ago is that they've plowed into the league lead in walks.

In other news, the Cubs have reacquired outfielder Tony Womack, signing him to a minor-league contract after he was designated for assignment and released by the Reds. Seeing as how there are fewer major league talents than roster spots with the Cubs, moving Womack to the roster to replace Freddie Bynum would give the Cubs more versatility for interleague play, allowing them to slide Jacque Jones into the DH role instead of starting second-baseman (a.k.a. starting first-baseman) Todd Walker to give the Cubs more speed and defense in the outfield. It won't mark the difference between chump and champ, but it would at least appear that the Cubs recognize roster moves are necessary.